Barbidoesmiami

How to Stay Sane in the City of No Shame

pear shaped

1 Comment

 savannaaah

savannaaah

its like duh moment:
i’m more pear shaped now than when I left PA. i can feel it. all that crap food went straight into my butt and my thighs as i drove and drove. it never got digested it just went to the lowest gravity point in my driving seat. and now i understand. if i drive, eat at available restaurants across america and finish what they put in front of me then i too end up 250 pounds, pear shaped with a heart condition.
favorite billboard today:
an enormous automatic weapon, cut out, and a man in army fatigues shooting something similar in the corner and large red letters that said:
” relieve yourself, exit 37″. exit 37 was called College Avenue. naturally.
most uncomfortable moment:
heavy rainstorm just after st augustine. I had my car pimped, detailed, waxed last week because i thought i might trade it in for something less carpool mum, four wheel drive, less ozone impacting and more like road candy, milf does miami, kinda convertible vehicle so the guy, crosseyed as a gekko, who waxed the body must have waxed the windows as well and all that rain kinda bubbled to the wax creating a frosted windshield effect and making me aware of rain and road and trucks and me in my car with my kids  in a manner that was so not cool.
funnest moment:
singing with clapton and the girls, leilaaaaaa at the top of our voice, rockin it into the vero beach zone.

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Author: barbidoesmiami

Barbi is a stupid model, fashion designer, writer about women and beauty, repurposeur of ocean plastic garbage into jewelry, mover from milford to miami, mother of iona kiki and leila, lover of alastair

One thought on “pear shaped

  1. Hi sweetie..
    I too wonder what you are doing but change does no harm, your beautiful home is still there and you will have fresh material for a hilarious book.
    keep posting
    hugs
    carox

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